Gracie Allen quotes - page 2

I was so surprised at being born that I didn't speak for a year and a half. (Gracie Allen)
Today millions of people are living who will never do it again. Millions are being born for the first time - and millions are doing nothing because it's the best offer they've had this week. It is for these people and many others that the Surprise Party is conceived and desecrated, founded upon the principle that everybody is just as good as anybody else, even though they aren't quite so smart. View quote
Gracie Allen
Let's all pull together and make these United States the grandest place in this whole country. I see a vision. A glorious vision. A united people, marching forward shoulder to shoulder, giving their all for the common good, working while I whistle. View quote
Gracie Allen
As a well-known great man would have said if he had thought of it, "Don't go around offending people just because it can be done sitting down." View quote
Gracie Allen
A keyhole speech is very simple, especially mine. First it states the issues. An issue is just a difference of opinion, which is why we put erasers on horse races. And as I always say, as long as we have issues, we can't have everything. View quote
Gracie Allen
As we walk hand in hand through the pathways of knowledge, remember that I am giving you freely and without stint the full accumulation of my two months' experience as a candidate. View quote
Gracie Allen
So vote early and often. Don't wait until Election Day. View quote
Gracie Allen
I'm having my platform run up by a movie set designer, so it will be very impressive from the front, but not too premanent. View quote
Gracie Allen
Today millions of people are living who will never do it again. Millions are being born for the first time–and millions are doing nothing because it's the best offer they've had this week. View quote
Gracie Allen
Don't go around offending people just because it can be done sitting down. View quote
Gracie Allen
Ever since I threw my hat in the ring I have had myself shadowed, and the results were very entertaining. (Gracie Allen)
Who am I to talk? That's a fair question, and one which deserves a better answer than I can give you. View quote
Gracie Allen
I'll make a prediction with my eyes open: that a woman can and will be elected if she is qualified and gets enough votes. View quote
Gracie Allen
Let them call us nonentities. Who cares? A nonenitiy can be just as famous as anybody else if enough people know about him. But let's leave personalities out of this and just talk about me. View quote
Gracie Allen
Let's all pull together and make these United States the grandest place in this whole country. View quote
Gracie Allen
Now, I don't pretend to know all the answers. I'm just a plain, ordinary, everyday genius who loves her fellow-man whenever possible. View quote
Gracie Allen
It's silly to think that Presidents are born, because very few people are 35 years old at birth, and those who are won't admit it. View quote
Gracie Allen
Offend the other candidates, because they'll be too busy talking to hear you, and besides, they might not vote for you anyway. View quote
Gracie Allen
I'm having my platform run up by a movie set designer, so it will be very impressive from the front, but not too premanent. After all, there's no sense putting a lot of time and thought into something you'll have no use for after you're elected. View quote
Gracie Allen
As we walk hand in hand through the pathways of knowledge, remember that I am giving you freely and without stint the full accumulation of my two months' experience as a candidate. I have on file a complete record of everything I've said and done. Ever since I threw my hat in the ring I have had myself shadowed, and the results were very entertaining. The things that go on in those back rooms, you wouldn't believe. So now we begin our journey together. If you follow these instructions carefully, you will find that every step of your progress, like the path that climbs up and up from the sheltered valley, offers you an ever-wider and more facinating vista, until at last you come out upon the summit of the wrong hill. View quote
Gracie Allen
You remember me. I'm Gracie Allen. I'm the candidate who forgot to take off her hat before she threw it in the ring. Furthermore, I'm the only candidate who got the idea of running myself. All the others had to have somebody else think it up for them, or anyway they say the only reason they're running is because their many friends kept after them and after them until they finally gave in. (Gracie Allen)