Robin Williams quotes - page 6

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say Stop, or I'll say stop again. (Robin Williams)
Mr. Keating Carpe Diem Sieze the day. View quote
Robin Williams
Do you think God gets stoned? I think so... look at the platypus. View quote
Robin Williams
Mr. Keating Seize the day Make your lives extraordinary. View quote
Robin Williams
And I love to ride my bike, which is great aerobics, but also just a great time for me to think, so it's like this terrific double bill. View quote
Robin Williams
[Describing US food aid delivered to Afghanistan after 9/11]. View quote
Robin Williams
[About pre-9/11 and post-9/11 airport security] Airport security, remember before all this happened, was like, BEEP, 'Okay, get on the plane. Come on, get on the plane. Hold on one moment. What's that? Oh, that's a gun. Okay, get on the plane!' You could carry a four-inch blade on a plane. That's about that long. What are you doing, West Side Story in the aisle? "Going down the aisle! Crazy aisle!" Now, you can't even carry a nail-clipper on a plane. Are they afraid you're gonna go "ALL RIGHT! Gimme the plane or the bitch loses a cuticle! I have a nail file! I can be irritating!" View quote
Robin Williams
[Imitating a Frenchman] Fuck all of you! You cultureless, crass Americans! We hate all of you! Fu-the Germans are here! Hello, Americans! I love you! View quote
Robin Williams
[Describing the drinking habits of different ethnic groups, in an Irish accent]. View quote
Robin Williams
And California weed is kick-ass fuckin' weed. This is weed that even Jamaicans go "Oh, don't smoke that weed, man." It's California Catatonic. The type of weed, you hit it and it's like...[pantomimes smoking a blunt] "FUCK! Shit...I'm not doing something. What is it? Oh right, BREATHE!" View quote
Robin Williams
[imitating weatherman] "Okay, let's go to our new hurricane weather map...(screen behind him shows a massive cyclone) ...FUCK! This is Hurricane Siobhan. The map is the entire South. The asshole in the middle is Dallas...um, crazy...back to you, Ted, I just shit myself. (Robin Williams)
My favorite athletes of any Olympics are always the African distance runners. You never have to drug test an African distance runner. View quote
Robin Williams