Erma Bombeck quotes - page 6

It is fast approaching the point where I don't want Adenauer to want the job. (Erma Bombeck)
I've never vied for power in the family before. Pointing a box at the garage door and saying Open was never a big deal, but holding that television tuner and realizing I alone control what is flashed on the screen brings out the Iacocca in me. View quote
Erma Bombeck
Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead. View quote
Erma Bombeck
Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere. View quote
Erma Bombeck
What makes people laugh ... It's a happy marriage between a person who needs to laugh and someone who's got one to give. View quote
Erma Bombeck
Myths that need clarification Everyone in California lives on a white, sandy beach. False. The only people who live on California beaches are vacationers from Arizona, Utah, and Nevada who own condos. View quote
Erma Bombeck
I do not participate in a sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill. View quote
Erma Bombeck
The art of never making a mistake is crucial to motherhood. To be effective and to gain the respect she needs to function, a other must have her children believe she has never engaged in sex, never made a bad decision, never caused her own mother a moment's anxiety, and was never a child. View quote
Erma Bombeck
We've got a generation now who were born with semi-equality. They don't know how it was before, so they think, this isn't too bad. We're working. We have our attache cases and our three piece suits. I get very disgusted with the younger generation of women. We had a torch to pass, and they are just sitting there. They don't realize it can be taken away. Things are going to have to get worse before they join in fighting the battle. View quote
Erma Bombeck
I'm going to stop punishing my children by saying, Never mind I'll do it myself. View quote
Erma Bombeck
Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden. (Erma Bombeck)
The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had a waiter in Canada who said, Could I get you your check and we answered, How about the menu first. View quote
Erma Bombeck