After I won the Oscar, my salary doubled, my friends tripled, my children became more popular at school, my butcher made a pass at me, and my maid hit me up for a raise. (Shirley Jones)

After I won the Oscar, my salary doubled, my friends tripled, my children became more popular at school, my butcher made a pass at me, and my maid hit me up for a raise.

Shirley Jones

Related topics

butcher children hit maid pass raise school won Friends oscar

Related quotes

What we become depends on what we read after all of the professors have finished with us. The greatest university of all is a collection of books. View quote
Thomas Carlyle
I wondered a little why God was such a useless thing. It seemed a waste of time to have him. After that he became less and less, until he was... nothingness. View quote
Frances Farmer
No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick. View quote
Erma Bombeck
Do not keep on with a mockery of friendship after the substance is gone - but part, while you can part friends. Bury the carcass of friendship: it is not worth embalming. View quote
William Hazlitt
Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends. View quote
Richard Bach